by the Kabbalist Rabbi Baruch Shalom Halevi Ashlag
(Steps of the ladder, 1984, 3rd essay)
Why have I chosen these friends specifically?…
Why did these friends choose me?…
Isn’t it necessary for each and every one to reveal his love for his associates or is it enough that he feels it in his heart, loving his fellows in private and not revealing the hidden recesses of his heart. Modesty is well known to be a great virtue.
Perhaps we should say the opposite, that he must reveal his love of his colleagues to them, for the reason that this revelation will awaken in his friend also a love of the other colleagues of the association. He will become aware of the brotherly love, which envelops the whole group. This results in a further amplification of the love within the group due to the inclusion of the whole dynamics of group love in each individual. Instead of being limited to his own power, if he has, say, ten colleagues, he will have ten powers included within him, all of whom will be contribute to the satisfaction of the need for love of friends.
On the other hand, if the love of friends is left concealed, then that individual will lack the power of the group. It will be very difficult to judge his friend for their merits. Each one will think himself the righteous one; that he is the only one occupied in love of his fellow. Therefore he will have only a small power to work in love for his friends. Thus, love of friends must be in a revealed form, not concealed within the heart of each.
But one must constantly remind himself of the goal of the group. Otherwise the physical body will confuse the issues and goals. The body has its own itinerary, its own self-interest. It must be remembered that the group exists to come to love of fellow man, which is the springboard to love of the Creator.
All this benefit, however, occurs only when the person’s motivation in being part or the group is that he will have someone to benefit without compensation of any kind. But is his motivation in participating in the group is to receive all kinds of assistance, gifts or favors, then the physical body will rejoice, for any such association will be based upon self-love, which stimulates the senses of greed and lusts. The body will see its chances of big profit increase. It will see the help of friends as an opportunity for material acquisition.
It must be remembered that the association is founded on the love of the other. Each individual must accept upon himself love for the others, and hatred of selfishness. When each sees his friend endeavoring to subdue selfishness, and to enhance love for his fellows, he will be included within the friends intentions. If the group has, say, ten members, then each will have ten powers with which to subdue egotism and its concomitant hatreds. Otherwise, not only will each be left only with his own single power with which to love his fellows, (he does not observe them giving love, as they are all concealing their love) but quite to the contrary, the other members of the association will cause him to lose even his own lone power to give brotherly love. He will learn from their concealment of love to conceal love and will fall into self-love.
4. Does each have to know what his friend lacks in order to fulfill that lack or is it enough to work in general towards brotherly love?
Witch's Well 